Memory.

Is it really that hard for me to forget the past? Because no matter how hard I seem to try, it doesn't work. Those feelings associated with these moments bare the emotional vulnerability I once felt. He had that effect on me.

It's amazing how in a matter of months, I fell so hard for someone I never thought I'd fall for. And in the end, I got my heart broken. It's an endless cycle. A cycle that won't leave me alone. Why did I fall so hard for this kid? Wait no, I know exactly why. The real question is why can't I fully let him go? I've moved on but for some reason there's still a small part of me that's shaken when I see anything that reminds me of him or when people mention his name. It's frustrating because I keep thinking about him. These memories keep flooding back--good and bad. UGH. I must stop this. I have to rise above this, show him that it's not affecting me because it sure as hell seems like he's not phased by this one bit. Mothereff. Why are you so good at suppressing your emotions?! asdjfa;sjd; You and your damn perfected mask. I can't show weakness otherwise that means I lose and being the stubborn person that I am, I hate losing. It's pathetic. Whoever cares more loses right? Well I'm going to bring the score to a tie. I want nothing more than to free myself from everything you once were to me. If there's one thing you taught me, it's how to be apathetic. Time to put my gameface on.

Man I can't wait until college.